Written: 09/16/2010
I muse a lot about my work and how my sexuality trapped me. But today I want to explore some relationships, you know, with people.
I have wonderful and supportive friends, most of which could probably care less and will probably just be happy for me. But of course I worry.
And I worry most of all about the friend’s I’ve been blessed with the longest. Will they see me as lying to them for years? Using them? When I just didn’t know myself, wasn’t sure, and for so long, was filled with a scathing indifference.
So I found myself very surprised and very relieved when I heard the following, “I wish I could go back and make sure I had more gay friends. I wish I had more gay friends now.”
Sometimes I worry too much. Sometimes I’m relieved. I smiled to myself, finished my drink and laughed a little bit out loud.
It was like a weight was lifted.
Here’s hoping to continuing that trend.
All my best,
The King of Spades